I'm Still So Conflicted About Petunia Dursley In Harry Potter

Summary Petunia Dursley's character is more complex in the books, showing a deeper love for her sister Lily.

The Harry Potter movies left out crucial details about Petunia's background and relationship with Lily.

While Petunia's actions towards Harry are inexcusable, her backstory sheds light on her motivations and struggles.

I can't make up my mind about Harry Potter's Petunia Dursley. Like many adult characters in J.K. Rowling's series, Harry's aunt is deeply complicated. For much of the series, she is presented in a particular light, but this changed in the final few chapters of Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows. Of course, much of this was left out of the Harry Potter movies, which means many viewers have judged Petunia unfairly. On the other hand, book readers often give her too much slack and sympathy.

This confusion when judging the characters of Harry Potter's morality isn't unusual. The series is filled with ambiguous or morally complicated characters since this is a significant theme of Harry's story. In the case of Petunia Dursley, there is no denying throughout the series that she is simply awful. There can be no justifying her neglect and abuse of her nephew. However, a more complete look at her story reveals why she might have closed her heart and mind off from Harry, perhaps earning Petunia the tiniest sliver of sympathy.

Related How To Watch The Harry Potter Movies In Order (Chronologically & By Release Date) The Harry Potter chronology may be more confusing than you think - so when does it all take place?

There's So Much More To Petunia Dursley Than The Harry Potter Movies Let On

The Harry Potter Books Revealed The Deeper Truth Regarding Petunia's Character

First, it's important to note that the Harry Potter movies didn't provide the full picture. Petunia was a prominent figure in Severus Snape's memories in the Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows book, while the film only briefly showed her hate for Lily, even at a young age. On the page, we learn that Petunia, while also a bit of a brat, had deeply loved Lily when they were children and was heartbroken that her sister was being sent away to a magical school. She wanted so much to stay with Lily that she wrote a letter to Dumbledore begging to be allowed to attend Hogwarts herself.

Of course, Dumbledore could not permit Petunia to go to Hogwarts, and this rejection by the magical world really stung. To make matters worse, Lily and Snape found out about Petunia's letter, and the shame of it led the two sisters to argue. Petunia said horrible things to Lily, but, in this scene, it's clear that this is just a hurting child. It wasn't the same kind of spite and jealousy-fueled moment that Petunia had implied back in Harry Potter and the Philosopher's Stone. She didn't really think that Lily was a freak.

Another way the Harry Potter movies failed Petunia's character is the adjustment to her age. Lily Potter was only 21 years old when Voldemort murdered her, and Petunia was only a year or so older. They were just years into adulthood, and this detail highlights the fact that the two sisters hadn't been estranged for nearly as long as is often assumed. In fact, Rowling has revealed that Lily and James had attended the Dursleys' wedding only a couple of years before their deaths, and there is further indication that Lily and Petunia hadn't fully cut one another off.

I Think Petunia Might Have Worked Things Out With Her Sister If Lily Hadn't Died

Petunia & Lily Were Both So Young When They Lost Their Chance To Mend Things

Close

The thing that strikes me the most about Petunia and Lily's relationship is the evidence that they tried to work things out. Rowling provided a more thorough background on the Dursleys on Wizarding World, outlining how Petunia and Vernon met and their relationship with the Potters. Petunia was drawn to Vernon because of his normalcy—after being rejected by the wizarding world, she wanted a life as typical as possible. However, Vernon didn't mix well with James Potter, so Petunia and Lily's attempts to maintain a relationship always went south.

According to Rowling, Petunia and Vernon went on a double date with Lily and James, but James misbehaved, causing Vernon to storm out and Petunia to follow. Lily was left in tears.

At some point after her wedding, Petunia decided to end all contact with Lily and devote herself entirely to her very ordinary life on Privet Drive. However, given her young age and the hints throughout Harry Potter that she still carried suppressed love for Lily, I can't help but feel that this wouldn't have lasted forever. Prior to their deaths, James had promised Lily that he would work things out with the Dursleys, and it's even revealed in Deathly Hallows that Petunia had sent Lily an ugly vase as a Christmas present. However, Lily's murder, something Petunia couldn't have foreseen, made a resolution impossible.

Petunia Dursley Doesn't Deserve Redemption (But I'm Still Sympathetic Toward Her)

My Conflicted Feelings About Petunia Are Precisely The Point

Looking at things from Petunia's perspective, I can understand why she would have despised magic and anything out of the ordinary. By no choice of her own, she was immensely ordinary, and this fact had separated her from the magical sister she loved. Vernon Dursley loved her for being normal, so Petunia would have gone to any lengths to cut ties with the magical world. Good riddance, really, since her sister's world had rejected her anyway. To make matters worse, the wizarding world killed Lily Potter—all the proof Petunia needed that magic was bad and dangerous.

The characters of Harry Potter challenge the idea that any one person is all bad or all good, and Petunia Dursley is further proof that no one is ever that simple.

I can understand and sympathize with all of this. Rowling constructed a subtle but impactful story for Petunia, which resonates greatly with me. However, it doesn't excuse the fact that Petunia Dursley was downright abusive toward her nephew. Her desperation to be loved by Vernon meant that she allowed him to treat Harry cruelly, and her fear of the wizarding world led her to reject the boy herself. All of this leaves me conflicted, but this is entirely the point. The characters of Harry Potter challenge the idea that any one person is all bad or all good, and Petunia Dursley is further proof that no one is ever that simple.